A Confession

I wonder if anyone will figure out who this is about…

Is it the colour of your eyes?

a sea of grey, murky like smoke and mirrors,

but au contraire, my dear,

that’s a compliment,

I’d love to unravel your mysteries,

I’m not afraid of them.

You’ve made butterflies emerge from their cocoons,

ready to fly.

confined in a space so small,

they have no choice but to make a ruckus,

Is it your smile?

I can’t remember if your lips stretch over your teeth,

if you smirk more than you grin

I still smile the same every time,

no, sorry, my mistake,

I don’t smile, I grin.

my eyes disappear, my teeth on full display.

“my mind is living on cloud nine and that nine is never on vacation. start up that Maserati and vroom vroom I’m racing”

my dear, you’re that Maserati.

I wonder if you notice anything:

my awkwardness?

my silence?

my attempts at words?

I’ve realized,

you’re a little oblivious

or a lot

but you know what?

that’s okay.

-EVA

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He Loves Me

This was a poem I wrote after listening to “The Type” by Sarah Kay. Love is also something that I see everywhere I go, so I wrote my observations in a poem

“He Loves me”

When you find a significant other, here are some things to keep in mind

One: You are picking the petals off of a flower. “He loves me, he loves me not, he loves me, he loves me not…” you are going to end up on “he loves me not” every single time. You will destroy your mother’s flower garden and still not find the flower with the odd number of petals. You will throw thousands and thousands of them in the air, waiting to be caught by the wind, before you tear off one “he loves me”.

You will keep on going, because that petal wasn’t pretty enough. You refuse to accept that it’s your only “he loves me”. You keep on searching.

Two: Someday, you will finally stop on THE petal. The one you feel content with. Keep it. Keep it tucked in a notebook containing the secrets to your heart. Make it the key to your heart. Make sure the man you share them with has the exact same key.

Three: There will be so many men who will look at you like you are the missing link. You are the answer to that one question that they’ve been struggling with. Once you fill them in, they’re content.

It’s the other way around. Men should look at you like you are the question. You are a book filled with questions they need to fill in. They’ve got a box of pens sitting at their feet, waiting to be used up. They’ve only got so much correction tape, because not everything can be covered up and fixed. They will sit there filling you in until every single blank space is covered. Because they’re okay with sacrificing their time for you.

Four: When you moan about your problems to them for the millionth time, they’ll treat it as your first. They’ll give you new insight, rather than repeating the same advice for the millionth time. When you approach them sobbing your heart out over an incident years ago that you still haven’t gotten over, they’ll hold you close, wrap their arms around you, and squeeze you tight. They won’t say a thing, because they know that sometimes, silence is a better cure than words.

-EVA

Pieces 

A very short poem that I wrote on the bus about a week and a half ago. I can’t think very well on the bus, which is why this poem is quite short.

Pieces

I’m reading the same line again,

Trying to process the meaning of words I don’t understand

Isn’t this like me and you?

Constantly, I try to understand what you want,

(Is it me? Is it a better future? Is it a future without me?)

Even though I have no idea who you are.

I’m picking apart the letters, putting together the syllables

Piecing together your heart isn’t any easier.

I’m short a screwdriver, I’ve lost a bolt.

It needs extra parts,

But I’m not sure if I’m ready to give mine away.

Can I trust you to keep mine beating?

-EVA

Not Afraid

This is a short spoken word poem that I wrote a couple weeks ago. It might sound like an extremely personal poem, but it’s not about me. i just wrote it in the spur of the moment. I hope you…whoever you are…enjoy reading this.

Please do not steal this and mark it as your own. If you want to display this poem somewhere else, credit where it’s due.

“Not Afraid”

When the world hands you hurt, don’t run away,

Walk towards it with determined caution

Walk towards it with the hope that you’d fight back the best you can

When hurt puts our battered heart back in place,

We should be thankful it’s still there.

It’s the little things that we never stop to look back and reflect upon

But shouldn’t we?

How else do we learn not to turn the lights off before we know our way in the dark?

Only until we can walk to the next stage without feeling our way around with crutches

Can we truly say we mastered the art of learning from mistakes

But they’ll happen, and some will say “it’s because you got hurt” and others “it’s because you’re hurting”.

hurt will claw at your rib cage

Desperate to crack every single one of them in half

Trying to reach your heart,

Peel it apart

Knocking you over yet again

I’ll walk over with open arms

“I’m not afraid of it”

I’m afraid of the crumbling mess that it’s gonna leave behind, the buildings that just keep on falling, the holes that won’t patch themselves up.

But not it.

-EVA

Pros and Cons

“If you feel the need to make a pros and cons list, then he’s not the right guy for you” – a friend

After some serious thinking, I realized that he was right. At least somewhat. For every relationship, especially if you want it to be a successful one, there shouldn’t have to be a list. Everything about your relationship should be a pro, and if it is a con, it should be an easily resolved one. There should be an infinite amount of pros for every con.

My friend told me that his list would look something like this:

Pro: I love her too much

Con: I love her too much

That is a relationship worth continuing.

With a crush though, you don’t know if the relationship will be a good one. Anything can happen. The person you think the guy you like is may not be the same guy in the future, for better or for worse. If you only have positive things to say about the guy you have a crush on, then maybe you dont know him well enough to be in a relationship with him. You should be able to find his flaws, but still like him with or without those flaws.

In my opinion, creating a pros and cons chart for a crush isn’t a bad thing, it’s finding where you stand and whether the crush is worth continuing. If you find more cons about him than pros, is it worth chasing after him? Or is it better to let go of your feelings and wait for someone better to come along?

-EVA

I’m Not Ready

Its the end of term again, finals are quickly approaching (I have my biology lab final on Tuesday. *cries* ) and classes are ending. There are only 2 more sessions of each of my classes.

Usually I wouldn’t really care, because I only make a couple friends in each class, and most of those people are in the same faculty as me, so I usually see them again in a different class.

This term, I’m taking FRENCH 210, and I’ve made friends with some really rad people in that class. I don’t know if I’m ever gonna see them again because we’re all in different faculties. I’ve made friends with people in the department of English, international studies, economics, history, communications…etc. They’re all super awesome people and I don’t want to not talk to them again.

The good news is, most of them will be talking FRENCH 211, and we have a high chance of being in the same class again (there are 2 classes), so we’re going to try and arrange our schedules to fit the class in.

-EVA